I don’t know how to not care about you! I don’t know how to not want you! I don’t know how to not think of you as MY woman! Though beginnings can present a formula for a rough and rocky road it is great to know that with the passing of time the rough and rocky can be m
ade smooth and full of unthinkable joy!
I have learned to hold onto moments and treat them as though they were timeless! A simple walk to the train station became a timeless walk with an unimaginable mental lover. A one-stop train ride became a ride that I hoped would never end! Oh, how I imploded with sadness as you or I exit the train doors! My stomach turned with loss as it screamed, “COME BACK or GO BACK” depending on which one of us were leaving that magical ride!
As OUR train pulls to a permanent HALT and the conductor says,“PLEASE EXIT THE TRAIN,” I sit not knowing what to do with all the joy and love I feel inside for my unimaginable mental lover who now is so real in my life!
Another train pulls in across the platform and opens its doors as if it’s waiting for her. My now-real lover pauses and looks at me with tears in her eyes! She stands up and exits OUR train and walks across the platform to the train whose last stop is FOREVER, and boards it!
I sit! I cry! I hurt! Yet, I smile for I had the opportunity to turn a brief moment that started as a road to nowhere into what seemed like a timeless moment! As I stand and exit OUR train, I look across the platform hoping that you would be there waiting for US! I tip-toe to the edge of the platform and I see your train moving rapidly away with the sun at its back. It gets smaller and smaller as it distances itself from me! Your train smiles and you smile back as you ride off into forever!
As for me, I stand on the platform of life, not knowing how to not care for you, not knowing how not to love you, and not knowing how to not think that you are my woman!
